Blunt the Blades: Chelsea Look to Take Down Sheffield United

Chelsea head back to Stamford Bridge this Saturday for their home fixture against Sheffield United, a newly-promoted side whose nickname “The Blades” points to Sheffield’s glorious tradition of cutlery production. Christian Pulisic, Chelsea winger and ‘Merican extraordinaire, knows something about cutlery, or at least slicing and dicing defenders and eating them for breakfeast (see: brunch [see: afternoon tea]). Interesting fact about this game: In the last game, current manager Frank Lampard was actually on the field as Chelsea curtsied past Sheffield United 3-0. However, Frankie might not have played that well, as he he was subbed off for Michael Ballack, the Kaiser from Chemnitz, in minute 46. Chelsea look to continue their season-high win-streak of one, while The Blades look to rebound from a devastating loss against Leicester City that sees them already thinking about avoiding relegation to England’s U-14 sixth league.

All jokes aside, this is a wonderful opportunity for Chelsea to continue to gain confidence after their spirit-lifting performance last weekend against Norwich City. Chelsea have looked sharp at times this season, but have failed to look sharp for even a majority of a match.

This is also another opportunity for Frank Lampard to demonstrate how much (or how little) faith he has in Christian Pulisic, aka Cha Boi, aka the Pillager from PA. Pulisic played — no slicing or dicing around this fact — bad against Leicester City. He had many, many giveaways. Against Norwich he was much better. And with Callum Hudson-Odoi and Willian returning to fitness, it’s sort of now or never for Chour Boi. He needs to play well. He needs to impress.

Dare I say it, he kind of needs to score.

That is, of course, if he even starts.

He most likely will though, as Pedro is set to miss the Sheffield United match due to the same hamstring injury that caused him to miss out against Norwich.

 

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Huge 3 points🙌🏽 we keep going💙

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Pedro’s absence also might mean we see Ross Barkley again, which would be another fantastic opportunity for him to silence his league of doubters.

As far as strikers go, Tammy Abraham will undoubtedly start again.

As far as I go, I will probably not start. I’ve been playing well lately, but still haven’t recovered the speed and fitness I had when I was 13 and my club team won state in Washington State after I broke my leg. I haven’t talked to Frank yet (or ever), but I’m pretty sure he knows that were he to give me the nod I’d give it everything my 36-year-old heart has to offer. After all, one time when I was in line at Chipotle someone told me I looked like Xavi Alonso.

Luckily, Chelsea’s Saturday match is a little later in the day, which means I can actually watch it live provided I can figure out how to watch it on my phone. Which means at around 7:00am PDT I’ll be stirring on my boat, ready to test lung capacity as The Blues trot onto the field.

Can’t hardly wait.

 

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